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| SrA Valencia and his wife Jessica at his 1st homecoming of their marriage. (Photo curtesy of www.carlymoonimages.com) |
What does a military spouse and a Christian have in common?
We are both waiting for our bridegroom to return. I am about through my 7th
year of being a military spouse and if there is one thing I know, it is that my
husband will be gone…a lot. For some of you it is your wife, brother, son,
daughter. Whoever it is you have played the waiting game before. Waiting for a
letter, phone call, expected return date, their actual return date, the 2nd, 5th, and 10th
first kiss. When my husband first leaves I put on my happy face and fake it. I
fake it until I believe it. I am fine,
don’t lose it right here in the BX, be strong for your son, don’t let your
husband see how hard it is on you. I am not in anyway taking the credit for
a deployment. The service member has to put on the same face. They don’t have a
chance to lose it. They must hold it together and for that I give my husband
and all else serving my utmost respect.
We are referred to as Jesus’s bride and he is our
bridegroom. In the parable of the 10 virgins (Matthew 25) they are waiting for
the return of their bridegroom. Five turn out to be foolish and miss the
wedding while the remaining 5 are wise and were able to attend the wedding
feast. What an amazing visual for the military spouse! This is what we do all
the time! We are waiting for our husbands to come, waiting to be reunited.
Here are some similarities of the military spouse and a
Christian:
1.
Remain Faithful! Being faithful to your spouse
is a must during deployment. It can be hard. Sadly, some spouses cannot endure
this trial and waiting and they fill the missing gap with another where their
spouse should be. There is temptation all around us to not stay faithful. We
live in a culture where being monogamous in a marriage is not a top priority.
We are to have no other idols before our
Lord God. Until His return we are to
remain faithful to Him and keep his commands. He loves us and deeply wants us
to remain faithful. Remaining faithful to Jesus means to stay away from sin and
temptation. If we do slip and break that trust we must come to our bridegroom
and confess and ask for forgiveness. The amazing
thing is that He will always forgive
and welcome us back with open arms.
2.
Communicate! Communication varies from each
deployment and TDY (a ‘short’ deployment). Sometimes we are able to Skype daily
while others an email here and there must suffice. No matter the circumstances
we always do our best to communicate with one another. We share our feelings,
talk about our hopes, dreams, and plans for the future, talk about our current
life, ask for advice, and anything else to fill the gaps of time we are missing
out on. Communication is what kept us on track with each other. It kept our
love alive. We actually always grow closer during his absence because of our
communication while he is away.
We must be in constant communication with
Jesus. He may not physically be with us but he is always there to communicate
through prayer. We can say it out loud, type it, write it, or even think it and
He hears it. He loves it when we
communicate with Him. It will make out relationship stronger by doing so.
3.
Show Your Love! From my years of supporting
spouses on the home front of a deployment I have noticed I learn a great deal
about their spouse during that time. Topic of conversation somehow always
evolves to their spouse, sharing stories about their recent conversations, funny,
and memorable times. You name it, I hear it. We tend to talk about the one we
love more when he/she is not with us. I have spent evenings with friends before
just sharing stories about our husbands. It makes it feel like they are closer
to us.
It should be the same about Jesus.
Right before Jesus ascends into Heaven after his resurrection he gave us all a
command: “GO to all of the world and preach the gospel to every person.” (Mark
16:15) What does that sound like to you? Talk all about Him until He returns! Share
stories of Him, teach people of His personality! This is what us spouses do
while our loved one is gone.
No matter what branch of service or how long the service
member has been gone there is one thing I can guarantee you about each
deployment: When he/she returns your marriage will either be stressed or it
will be stronger. It takes a while to
get used to your loved one being home. You have had your own schedule and way
of living set without him/her during their absence and it can be hard to go
back to the way things were.
(Funny story: When my husband returned from his 1st
tour in Iraq he kept getting aggravated because I wouldn’t stop talk to our dog
who never responded back to me. I was asking my dog for his opinion, ask him
what he wanted for supper, etc. I had just gotten to used to talking to my dog
for 8 months that it was hard to get out of that habit.)
When Jesus returns for His bride how will your marriage take
off? Will it be on shaky ground or will it be even stronger? Take a look at how
you are living your life right now and think about it as if you are the spouse
on the home front and Jesus is the military member away. Would He approve of
our behavior or how you are talking about him (or if you are talking him?)
Unfortunately I have seen some spouses during a deployment where you would not
even know they were married if you didn’t know them. How do you think that
makes the loved one away feel?
Too often we put Jesus in that situation. Would others
around you even know you belong to Christ? Sure, you might have your personal
communication with Him but how do people know you are His?
“Love the Lord your
God with all your and will all your soul and with all you strength.”
Deuteronomy 6:5
What are ways you
keep communication and show your love either to Christ or your military hero?
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| Two of our 'homeocomings' in 2011 and 2013. We surprised our son but he was obviously too into snack time to care. :) |
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